They might want to call the Vancouver Games the “Upset Games.” At least that ‘s what they are in terms of the hockey tournament going on. Slovakia over Russia. America over Canada. Czech Republic over Sweden. WHAT IS GOING ON? This is crazy, just crazy.
I’m upset right now because of some of these upsets. I wanted the gold medal final to be between a combination of Russia, Finland, Sweden, and America. Now two huge hockey powerhouses- Russia and Sweden- are out. How the heck does that happen? Thirty years after the biggest upset ever (that’s the Miracle on Ice, if you didn’t feel like figuring it out), there are upsets aplenty at these Olympics.
Now, I have some words to say to some certain individuals, some good others bad:
To the Russian GM…
Dear Vladislav Tretiak,
How does Sergei Zubov sound now that Russia’s out of the tournament? You could have really used a defenseman like him to calm your team down and actually make them look put together. Russia looked frantic and like they had no plan whatsoever. It didn’t help that your coach, Vyacheslav “Slava” Bykov, didn’t look like an adequate coach. And Mr. Tretiak, I just wanted to say that I was right.
To Alex Ovechkin…
Once again your team didn’t show up when it mattered most. I’m sorry for that. You’re awesome, you’re perfect, don’t change a thing. Just keep being yourself and someday you will be rewarded. Ovie, you’re one of my favorite players in the NHL. To me, you are the epitome of my ideal hockey player- exciting, skilled, and has a personality.
When some call you a jerk, I call you a bad-ass. When they call you dirty, I call you forcefully passionate. When they call you non-traditional and cocky, I call you a rebel. More than anything, Alex, just keep doing what you’re doing.
To Team USA…
What. A. Game. Way to relive the Miracle on Ice and stage a miracle of your own. I’ll admit that I was uncertain how such a young team could possible medal. Thankfully, I was wrong. I cheered the way I only cheer during the Olympics, if that makes sense. When Ryan Kesler scored that empty-netter, he was no longer a dirty Canuck. I didn’t care that Bobby Ryan was a Suck and a Mike Modano-wannabe. I didn’t care that Brooks Orpik was a teammate of Sidney Crosby. They were all Americans. And that is what the Olympics does to a person.
To Sidney Crosby…
I don’t like you even more if that’s even possible.
To Brenden Morrow…
I am not about to compliment you on your superb play for Canada. Rather, I’m about to chew you out for it.
Brenden, why is it that you look like you care more about Team Canada than the Dallas Stars? Why is it that all year long you’ve wanted to make Canada’s Olympic team than you wanted the Stars to make the playoffs? Why can’t you play for the Stars the way you play for Canada? Do we not give you good enough linemates on the Stars? It’s funny, because Jamie Benn, Steve Ott, and Mike Ribeiro aren’t exactly Mike Richards and Jonathan Toews, but they still get the job done.
We want Brenden Morrow, circa 2006-2008. Where’d he go? Do we need to find him for you? Where did our heart and soul of the team Morrow go?
Brenden, make itlook like you care, even if you don’t. Please do that much for me…
In Other News:
Alex Auld has been waived. Looks like we’re keeping Turco, huh? Of course you never know with GM Joe…
Finally, I just wanted to share this amazing gif that some wonderful perosn over at the Caps’ blog, Japer’s Rink, made.
No offense to Jaromir Jagr, but he was Ovechkin’d.